“I don’t know what to say,” they inform me.

I told them back, “you don’t need to say anything, just stay with me- because sometimes it hurts.

“I don’t know what to do.” they tell me, wringing their hands, bowing their heads in defeat.

I take their hand in mine, even though the effort costs me. The physical contact so needed when fighting a disease that often makes you feel like you’re alone- even in a room full of people .

You don’t have to do anything.
You don’t have to fix it.
Just be present.
Acknowledge my humanity while I struggle inhumanely.

Chronic. Illness.
Chronic.
Persistent for a long time, or constantly recurring.

Grace is needed, but it comes with a price. So does sympathy. Being present to feel what we are going through.

Because we’re going to go through it… more than once.

Understanding hurts.
For some, the cost is too high.
We lose them to banalities, half-hearted love bombing, and questions about our health they never really hear the answers to.

A price they’re not willing or able to pay.

If I share my struggles with you and I see your love for me, your concern- that says to me that I matter. That I’m worth listening to.

You cant fix it – Just acknowledging it’s here and that its real is worth more than anything you could ever say or do. Just listen.

And every once in a while, hold my hand and tell me that it’s going to be ok. And I’ll tell you the same.

Every once in awhile.

It not ok,
But it’s going to be ok.

If you haven’t heard it today, please let me be the first to say:
I love you.
You are beautiful.
The struggle is real.

Fight anyway.
XOXO

-Mel